I think the reason people fear games is that they're not serious enough. Men don't want to be hurt, or to waste their time, or to be made to seem the fool. Women don't want to be treated flippantly, lose their heart unfairly, or to get played. In other words, men and women often want the same thing.
To be left alone.
No, wait, that's not it. To be serious--if possible--the reason we don't like "Games" is that we don't like the idea that we might not be taken to be a real human being, to be a serious individual with a real agenda (and not an agenda in the "ulterior motives" sense; I mean in the "life plan" sense). No one wants to be the clown in the circus of life.
When we invoke games, we think of Monopoly, baseball, or chess--life and death struggles for money, power, domination, et cetera, that, as soon as they're done, are a joke. You shake the other team's hand, the bankrupt guy may have more money for dinner than the millionaire, and the king may be dead, but you can always play again. No one wants to be treated as flippantly as that.
We are human, though, and humans often crave structure in life. Some would argue that this is why humans have religions; because they need an enforcer saying "Thou Shalt Not" to monitor everyday life. We want the right rules enforced, not the bogus ones. We want the person inviting the other to dinner to pay, to hold the door, to plan the night out. We want both to say if they are or aren't interested in the other. That's just how we are.
I think Erin is wrong to conflate the idea of rules with games. We want rules--rules provide order, some certainty, some sense that you'll win if you follow them. In other words, rules are a comfort blanket. Games on the other hand, smack of repeated iterations of the scenario, not one of which matters. In other words, we balk at the potential of our own inability to matter.
That said, I think there is also a difference between the games and the rituals. I think that those who are bad at the rituals--those who come on too strong or too weak, those who don't hold a door if they need to, or those who don't brush their teeth before a date--are likely to be the ones frustrated by those who cling to the dating rituals. These are the people who I think Erin is referring to as being "bad at the game". It's not so much that this stuff is trivial, but that it is nuanced and seems minute and possibly trivial.
So if you're railing at the game, I think what you need to find out is if it's the player or the game.